bIRTHDAY

• Glad you were the strongest sperm

• Celebrate your birthday the way you came into this world: naked & screaming

• You were shot out of your dads penis

• Who knew one tiny sperm could turn into such a douche

• Happy birthday, sugartits

• Shoutout to your mom and dad for making you

• A late birthday gift is better than a late period

• Smart, good looking, and funny. But enough about me, happy birthday!

• Happy Birthday, asshole

• Damn, you're old

• I'm here to mourn the loss of your youth - happy birthday

• Didn’t we just celebrate this like a year ago? Happy Birthday

• Congratulations on another spin around the sun

• May the best of your past be the worst of your future

• Tell me again how old you are?

• You’re still hot after all these years

• Don’t fret over another birthday. You were already old.

• Your body is piling up the years, but your mental age is not

• At least you're not as old as you will be next year

• I usually forget everyone’s birthdays, so you should feel lucky that I’m sending you this

• Holy shit, you're how old?

• Count your blessings, not your wrinkles

• Another year has gone by but you haven't gotten any wiser

• Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional

• Happy birthday to you & your massive penis

• Happy birthday to you & your massive tits

• Can I blow out your candles

• Glad you were the strongest sperm

• You should have been swallowed

• {#} years of being a Twat

• If you wished for anal, not happening

• Happy Birthday to my best bitch

• Thanks for coming out of your moms vagina

• Too old for Tik-Tok, but too young for Life Alert

• Grateful your parents had sex

• Your dad came in your mom

• Happy developmental milestone