v{g}ALENTINE'S DAY

  • I'd swipe right

  • I'm so glad you're as weird as me

  • You're the one I text when I'm drunk

  • You're lucky to have me

  • Be my cum dumpster

  • Do you fancy me?

  • If you were president, you'd be Babe-raham Lincoln

  • I hope your day is as nice as your ass

  • You are above average

  • You warm my cold, black heart

  • I'm still not sick of you

  • You'll do.

  • Lets get naughty

  • Valentine's schmalentines

  • I love the shit out of you

  • You're my favorite ass hole

  • I'm so glad we got drunk and had sex

  • I love you like Kanye loves Kanye

  • I knew I loved you, when I farted and you stayed

  • You're the reason I get up in the AM.. JK, it's to pee

  • Fuck Valentine's Day, I love you everyday

  • You suck less than most people

  • You treat me like a unicorn, when I'm an ass

  • I fancy you

  • Uteruses before duderuses

  • Roses are red, violets are fine, you be the 6 & I'll be the 9

  • Thanks for letting me have sex with you

  • I'd introduce you to my parents

  • I love you from my head to my toes

  • What's Galentine's Day? Only the best day of the year

  • Cupid got it right

  • If there's a law against friendship, lock me up - happy Galentine's Day

  • You give me boners

  • You bring out the slut in me

  • I love your {genitalia}

  • Ovaries before broveries

  • Netflix and chill?

  • Happy alentines day.. don't worry, you'll get the V later

  • No one I would rather bone than you

  • I love you love a fat kids loves cake

  • Will you be my galentine?

  • Hoes before bros

  • Chicks before dicks

  • Netflix and a BJ?

  • Be my valentine

  • Roses are red, violets are blue, this cookie is cheaper than dinner for 2

  • Here is an edible valentine

  • Valentine's Day To-Do List: You

  • Sisters before misters

  • I love that I get to annoy you for the rest of our lives

  • You take me from 6 to midnight

  • I want a hickey on my dicky

  • Chicks before dicks

  • Galentine's Day: a day to celebrate my fav gals

  • I love you cause you're like me, and I'm the best

  • You suck less than most

  • I'd drink your bath water

  • Kiss the lips below my hips

  • You make me wet

  • I have a heart-on for you

  • I want to kiss your mouth with my penis

  • I'd shave my {genitalia} for you

  • You're in my inappropriate thoughts

  • You're on my to-do list

  • Screw you Valentine's Day, lets drink

  • You're the 'she' to my 'nanigans'

  • Will you swallow my semen?

  • Put a baby in me

  • If we were dogs, I'd sniff your ass