Mother's day

  • Thanks for having sex with dad

  • Thanks for birthing me

  • Mom, remember when you would still do that

  • My mom is better than your mom

  • Mom of the year

  • Kris Jenner has nothing on you! Happy Mother's Day!

  • You're the luckiest mom ever. I'd love to have me as a kid!

  • The art of lecturing, learned from mom

  • You remind me of {your mom's favorite female actress/musician/etc}

  • You are the Beyoncé of moms

  • Like mother like daughter

  • Mom, remember when you {filled in the blank}

  • No one can out mom you

  • Keep calm, ask mom

  • Sorry about your other kids, at least you have me

  • Without me, this day wouldn't mean much

  • Mom, you're one of my favorite parents

  • Sorry I ruined your body with my huge head

  • There's no one else I'd rather complain to

  • You are right about everything

  • Queen of domesticity

  • Honored to look just like you

  • Mom, where's the meatloaf (subset text: happy mother's day)

  • Good job, Mom, I'm awesome

  • Sorry I kicked you in the womb

  • Mom, you are the shit

  • Thanks 4 loving me, even though I ruined your vag

  • I turned out amazing, you're welcome

  • You're not a regular mom, you're a cool mom

  • Happy Mother's Day from your favorite child


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